I keep meeting (as in consistently over the past 7-8 years) guys who are using “fake it til you make it” in order to seem interesting…. And I’m calling it out.
I was just listening to a podcast where the guest was a guy who lives in Eastern/Central Europe and likes to tell people he’s a “personal coach”.
However, he is not. He just wants people to be interested in him and he believes that the truth about him is something he needs to be ashamed of.
[I’m changing some the details to keep him anonymous]
The presenters asked him “So what exactly do you do, how does it work?”.
He responded by going into a long ramble about how he loves supporting people, and how he used to assist his schoolteachers in coaching his school sports team.
He didn’t answer the question. I knew within 5 seconds, by the tone of his voice, that he was basically changing the subject.
The audience (if they’re still listening) still have no idea what he actually does. Liars never give short direct answers to questions. They give a lot of details, working hard to paint a picture.
And humans ain’t stupid. We can tell. Deep down, everybody knows when you’re lying.
All of the above might be absolutely fine if this was not the same guy who posts regularly in technical pickup artist groups asking for advice on “pulling” girls, which he has been having problems with since he started his “pickup” journey.
He’s struggling to connect with the women he meets because they don’t take him seriously, and they don’t take him seriously because he’s afraid of revealing who he really is.
Instead he performs in character as the guy he WISHES he was.
Do you do this?
I used to, before I summoned the courage to own who I am, what I want, and what I’m doing in this life. Life was shit back then.
Now, it’s wonderful, and I’m very grateful. All I had to do was grow the fuck up.
Because people LOVE the truth.
I’ve met women who have totally adored me immediately after introducing myself while showing them the holes in my shoes (back in my broke as fuck days).
I’ve stopped girls in the street and said during the conversation “I am nervous as FUCK, look at my hand, it’s shaking” and they’ve been VERY cool about it because they could see that what was happening was REAL, not a PERFORMANCE.
It’s not easy to be honest 100% of the time absolutely everything, but I dare you to experiment with it.
Because the response is invariably “I can definitely trust this guy. And I kinda like it.”
Even if you’re doing a bad thing. Or you’re somehow inadequate.
Owning up to it in a non-apologetic, non-complaining-about-your-situation, non-looking-for-sympathy-or-to-be-rescued kind of way is going to get you FAR in life.
Because the world is absolutely FULL of full-time bullshitters, and everybody is absolutely sick of it.
BE A BREATH OF FRESH AIR.
P.S – I’m now accepting students for my 1-month long “The Reset” online mentorship programme where I am guiding guys just like you into the greatest era of their dating and social lives. Do check it out here if this interests you.
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